Among them is Red Pill's founder, Adrian. For the first time, Leila has people who care what she thinks. Introverted nerd Leila finds a group of friends of sorts after discovering Red Pill, a Web discussion list that debates philosophical matters in a Randian fashion. Is everyone who they say they are? Would your friends and family realize someone else was posting on your accounts instead of you? Hm….Moggach's impressive debut, a gripping psychological thriller, is all the more disturbing for its plausibility. It’s a fun read, but also makes you consider the current state of our online world. The twisty plot of this book kept me interested and turning the pages. She even begins to fall in love with one of Tess’ old flames and believes that if they meet in person he will reciprocate her feelings. Leila throws herself into her online work with Tess and does not seem to create any boundaries for herself. I found it almost uncomfortable at times to think about experiencing what her character goes through: she is socially awkward to a painful extent. She thinks herself to be a rational person, but as the story unfolds, you begin to see how much she is truly pulling the wool over her own eyes. But why would you do it? Leila’s character is sheltered and claustrophobic she does not spend much time outside of her apartment and would rather make friends playing online games than outside in real life. On one hand, you can see from the news that it is fairly easy to impersonate another individual online (as scary as that is!).

It’s somewhat difficult for me to put myself into the shoes of Leila. As time goes on, Leila becomes more fixated and obsessed with the fake life she has created for Tess. Leila is hired to take over the online persona of a real woman, Tess, who wants to take her own life without her friends and family’s knowledge. When the creator of the site contacts her and contracts Leila to carry out a strange task, she agrees. The main character, Leila, is an active participant on a web forum called Red Pill. Although Kiss Me First isn’t the same type of plot as an episode of Catfish, it definitely puts you in the same, somewhat creeped out, state of mind. If you’ve ever seen an episode of Catfish you’ll know what I’m talking about: it seems commonplace for people to pose as someone they are not when they are online.

What disturbed me most about the story was the everyday believability of the situation. Kiss Me First is author Lottie Moggach’s debut novel, and it takes you on a journey into the realm of cyberspace…and makes you think about who is behind the screen when you are communicating online.

Kiss me first book